Keep the conversation focused and useful
A simple structure for a mentoring meeting.
- Check in: What has happened since you last spoke?
- Choose one topic: What would make this time useful?
- Explore: What options, questions, or perspectives are worth considering?
- Close: What will you try before you meet again?
One useful next step is enough; the meeting does not need to solve every part of a development question.
Prompts by conversation moment
Choose one prompt that fits the topic; leave room for both people to think.
| Moment | Try asking |
|---|---|
| Open | “What would make this time useful?” |
| Focus | “Which part of this situation do you most want to understand?” |
| Explore | “What options have you considered, and what might each make possible?” |
| Close | “What will you try before we meet again?” |
Worked example: prepare a project update
Fictional Northstar dialogue showing how a broad request can become a useful conversation.
Illustrative dialogue
Start with the situation
The mentee is preparing to lead a project update and asks what to emphasize.
- Mentee: “I have ten minutes for the update. How do I decide what to include?”
- Mentor: “Who needs the information, and what decision do they need to make?”
A small next step
Turn the discussion into an action
They decide the mentee will draft the update around the decision, then ask a colleague whether the key point was clear.
- The mentee brings the draft back to the next meeting.
- They discuss what worked and what to try differently.